President Trump Bans Bartering of Spa Services, Essential Oils, Shiatsu & Reiki Massage, Salt Rocks & Other Forms of "Fake Medicine"

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President Trump Bans Bartering of Spa Services, Essential Oils, Shiatsu & Reiki Massage, Salt Rocks & Other Forms of

In a sweeping reform of United States health laws, President Trump today declared that the operation of any company that barters Spa Services, Essential Oils, Shiatsu & Reiki Massage, Salt Rocks & Other Forms of "Fake Medicine" is illegal and punishable by a term of "no less than 15 years in federal prison.

"You've got people trading fake services that do nothing in exchange for legitimate products and services in organized barter exchanges" decried Trump. "It has got to stop and I'm the man to stop it" said Trump. We'll have more on this breaking news story as it develops.

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