Red Sox Surprise Fans With A New Manager; Get Ready For Teddyball

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After a successful regular season followed by another abrupt playoff exit, the Red Sox have chosen to go in a different direction. Dave Dombrowski explained, "We wanted to find someone with unbridled enthusiasm, endless energy, and a passion for playing. We think we've found it all in one man...er...male."

Enter, Teddy McKay.

During his first interview since getting the job, Teddy showed the status quo was not going to hold any longer. An exchange with a reporter shows he is going to be looking at non-traditional places to complete his lineup.

Reporter : "How do plan to address the concerns at 3rd base?"
Teddy : "Do you like to play? Please play? I have a ball! Come play! I like people who play!"

The move seems to have almost unanimous approval from fans, media, and crew. Only one Fenway employee seems to be upset by the news. One of the groundskeeping crew has been dismissed, due to Teddy's insistence on being sole maintenance staff dealing with the Pesky Pole.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.