Prostitution to be legalized in Michigan?

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In a move certain to make waves in the Great Lakes State, a bill has been introduced into the Michigan House of Representatives that would legalize prostitution. The bill, lead by Jonathon VanDouser (D-Holland), has gained support from both sides of the aisle as well as Gov. Rick Snyder.

The bill details not only the legalization of the 'world's oldest profession' but follows a model currently in use in Nevada; the only state where widespread prostitution is currently legal. The women (and men) involved would be paid a wage based on their experience in the field as well as performance bonuses and tips. The income revenue expected to reach the state coffers is estimated to reach $1.5 million by the end of 2019, if the bill passes. Long term projections put the additional funds at $45 million after only three years.

"It's a way to get them off the streets and into a legitimate job," said one Lansing staffer who spoke on condition of anonymity. "They'll be eligible for health benefits as well. This cuts down on crime and the spread of STD's."

The news of this bill has rankled the conservatives in many communities. When asked about the proposal, Pastor Michael Hunt of the Second Baptist Church said, "Why do we pay our representatives to allow this kind of debauchery to exist?" The 46-year old from Climax added, "The church has a very hard stance on this sort of thing. It's right there in the Good Book."

The bill is expected to be voted on in the next few weeks.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.