Arizona Man Charged With Excessively Boring FaceBook Posts

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July 24, 2017: 10:59 AM ET

Charges were filed today in Yuma County General District Court against a man accused of hazardous postings on FaceBook and Twitter. The man, a resident of Yuma County and long-time social media poster, has amassed a number of followers and “Friends” as they are called, who must see his postings when he posts. And, according to the complaint, “boy does he post.” The suit does not focus on the number of daily posts that are made (although research does show it is exorbitant), but rather than on the quality and content of the posts. Reportedly, those reading the posts often find themselves groggy and tired. There have been documented instances of his post readers’ falling asleep while at stop lights, after mistakenly glancing at their cell phone at one of the posts, and accidentally reading too much. Post topics range from the heat in Yuma, to the heat of the poster’s meats he likes to slowly cook using assorted methods. Other favorite weather-related topics include micro-burst rains, haboobs, and the heat. [Note: It is recognized that the heat is mentioned twice. But the posts about it are relentless.] Perhaps the most yawning of the posts involve the Cowboys football team. While the poster has absolutely no connection to the team, the city or even the state, he posts about that crappy team relentlessly. (Rumors abound about his liming the cheerleaders.) A hearing is set for August (unless it’s too hot.)

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.