Jamie Meier Retires; Waynewood Moms Hold Vigil

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Principal Jamie Meier's retirement from Waynewood Elementary (Alexandria, VA) has inspired Waynewood's Moms and teachers to hold a midnight vigil to help cope with their major loss. One mom, who asked to remain anonymous, was especially sad, "We feel as though we have nowhere to go. We are like a herd of sheep without a shepherd," She sobbed.

The vigil gathered over 400 community members and lasted three days total. There was a sharing of stories and even a candlelight ceremony with synchronized crying. To continue the mourning, there will also be a walk from Waynewood, in Alexandria, to Meier's house in Chantilly Virginia.

Mr. Meier's retirement has been quite the ordeal in the small, white Waynewood community. He has been rumored to have received many lavish gifts such as a $500K vacation certificate and even a race horse. Mr. Meier has very little to comment on this and has declined to comment on the vigil or the walk, only saying, "I've retired, please leave me the hell alone!" Waynewood still plans to hold the walk.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.