Yu Darvish is Heading For Houston
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According to the Texas Ranger's Twitter account, The Rangers and Houston Astros have agreed on a trade that would send Ranger ace, Yu Darvish, to the Houston Astros in return for 2 snuggies, a 7 inch dildo, 11 cans of spam, and broken fidget spinner. Sources close to both organizations report the Ranger's tried to get the Astros to include a 1988 Chevy Caprice but Houston drew a hard line.
Derek Mercer was with Darvish when the trade was announced. When asked about being traded, Darvish said:
" ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????"
After a short interview, Mercer pointed at Darvish's genitalia and said, "Delicious looking egg roll." The two laughed and then began to naked wrestle.
Darvish is set to make his Astro debut on July 32.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.