Bizarre creature found on the shore of the Wisconsin River by local fishermen

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The Wisconsin D.N.R. responded to a call from some residents about a bizarre creature they discovered while fishing on the Wisconsin River. According to the responding officer, the creature was unlike anything he's ever seen before. The locals (who asked to stay anonymous) said they could smell something dead while fishing from their canoe so they paddled over to investigate. Upon finding the odd creature, they immediately phoned it in. According to the D.N.R. official, both people in the canoe were clearly inebriated and the bottom of their boat was littered with empty cans (drinking out of a canoe is legal in Wisconsin as long as the vessel doesn't have a motor). The couple demanded that they get to keep the creature since they discovered it. When the warden refused them the animal, one of the fisherman told him to go fck himself, then slammed a beer and paddled off into the current while the both passengers in the canoe were making noises that resembled crow calls. Still no word on the origin of the creature

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.