City-wide ban on local artist NAKED GIRLS gets violent - Clevland Scene Magazine

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BRUNSWICK --
City officials are now starting to weigh militarization options for the city-wide ban on local recording artists NAKED GIRLS. The ban was initiated several weeks ago when the bands music, discovered on Soundcloud (soundcloud.com/naked_girls), initiated the largest communal sex event in northeastern Ohio's history. NAKED GIRLS were warned several times by city officials that if their music wasn't removed, promiscuity in Brunswick and surrounding areas could reach epidemic levels. So far NAKED GIRLS have refused any public commentary regarding the situation and have refused to remove their infectious, groove-laden chillout anthems. Police are starting to move towards a more forward and violent approach to removing the troublemakers from the community. "We are in the process of conducting a full raid on their musical compound." says chief of Brunswick Police Department Chris P. Bacon. "We plan to fully remove any musical equipment from their homes and punish them to the full extent of the law." Tension reached a peak high when Officer Bacon discovered he had been cuckholded by members of the musical group. "Whoever these guys are, we will find them. And we will make them pay". Chris confirms.

- Cory Manson for Scene Magazine

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.