Britain's Sexiest Mutha-Fucka Finally Revealed!
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David Beckham, step aside. Britain's sexiest Mutha-Fucka has been revealed as none other than Brian Dutton (37) of Sale, Cheshire.
Dutton, has escaped the attention of the judging panel for many years, accredits his ability to do so, to his penchant for being needlessly nasty & generally repellent to all those around him.
His partner of almost 11 years, Simon Conway (23) corroborates Dutton's story.
"You ought to smell him!" he exclaims.
Despite this, Brian's skillful choreography has set many fannies alight, having trademarked what are now considered by many experts as iconic moves; the 'Under-Leg-Clap' and the 'Dying Swan'.
Mr Dutton's representatives were unavailable for comment, however sources close to the minge-magnet suggest he's - "Over't fookin moon wit' results."
Then he farted, and exclaimed - "Fook me. That one would melt yer panties! It did mine!"
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.