Young Hooligan Steals Fat Woman's Dinner

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Young Hooligan Steals Fat Woman's Dinner
Benjamin Baird, age 13 and a half, takes all of Stockton by storm when he's caught stealing a rather large woman's dinner. Witnesses say she was eating 4 donner kebab buns, 2 packets of ready salted crisps, 5 sausages and 3 baked potatoes. This poor woman was infuriated as she happened to be on a diet and she had already cut down tremendously on food. Cleveland police are now hunting Benjamin Baird down and are ready to sentence him to prison for life. Benjamin was last seen sitting behind the co operative in hartburn, where he was rubbing his stomach as he ate too much. If anyone sees him, please contact the local authorities as there is a huge reward. Cleveland police have also set out loads of booby traps containing cheese, as young Benjamin is attracted to anything yellow, especially unbrushed teeth. Do not hesitate to ask further questions and please let us know immediaty of his whereabouts. We need your help!

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.